What it’s like to be on a dating app when you are over 50

Well, all I can say is avoid this situation at all costs.  I am 61 and would like to meet a nice lady in a similar age range. After reading the profile stories of most of the women on several apps, I have concluded that I am the only one who arrived at this age with any baggage. I am sure most of men’s stories are similarly unrealistic but I haven’t read those so I can’t be sure.

Apparently, nobody is on a dating site because they are lonely. I am the exception, I guess. One profile I read claimed that she “didn’t need a man and was just looking for someone to enhance HER life“. That sounds pretty selfish to me but maybe I just don’t get women.

My favorite is an obviously beautiful woman who posts a dozen pictures to prove it and writes “I’m beautiful” as her best quality. That seems pretty shallow to me but maybe I just don’t understand women.

To clear up any misunderstandings these women might have on my opinion, I wrote my profile story like this:

My Profile

“I’ve been around the block a few times and I am looking to go straight. I have a great sense of humor. I like movies, hiking and live music in small venues. I try to eat healthy as much as I can and go for 5 to 10 k walks at least twice a week preferably at a lake or park. It would be great to have some company.

I notice there are a lot of wonderful women on this website. You all seem to have advanced university degrees that have landed you amazing careers making bags of money developing cold fusion. You only eat bean sprouts & jog 10 miles a day. You all came in first at the Boston Marathon and love extreme sports.

You have wonderful children that are busy becoming heart surgeons and astrophysicists. In your spare time you are concert pianists and study philosophy. You managed to get to 50ish without any baggage. That is really awesome! I am looking for someone a little less together than that.

After being on this site for a while I noticed that a lot of you have some serious “requirements” for your future “life enhancement.” To set the record straight, I will not be providing copies of my financial statements, medical records, gym membership, library card or proof of matriculation (that’s right, I used a big word).

I don’t want your money and I am not interested in paying your bills.

I am 61 now so I am not really interested in skydiving, hang gliding, competitive dancing or alligator wrestling(similar to dancing). I would like to meet someone who is interested in the quality of my character not the quantity of my bank account.”

Let the hate mail begin.

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